i'm back to finishing my yoga space, putting down a plywood floor over the radiant heat system. this project has been stalled for months. it feels good to attend to it. my habit is to get way too many projects going at the same time, leaving the ones with unclear goals or personal challenges to rest or wither. i'm not sure what exactly challenges me with this project, but all of the following figure to some degree: finishing the project will compel me to use the space, meaning i'll feel a need to become more disciplined in my yoga practice and face my fears about that; a friend helped me with the first stages of the project and we then came to blows—his memory lingers; i have fear about puncturing the radiant heat system while screwing down the plywood; i feel reluctance to spend money on carpet; i've promised people i'll start teaching a class when i finish the space; i've had difficulty making a decision about how to lay the floor down (glue or no glue).
so, with each sheet of plywood i put down, i feel i'm tackling a raft of issues, creating not only a plane on which to practice yoga but also the space in which to honor, accept and cope with fear and hope. the carpentry has returned me to my body after a weeks of desk-bound web coding and each sheet is a physical challenge that connects my psychological world to my body. lifting 4x8 sheets of 3/4" plywood takes care, strength, pacing and clear focus. getting the tongues and grooves to meet takes cleverness, patience, force and precision. this laying of plywood is teaching me much of what i learn on a yoga mat and that what i experience on the mat i can experienced in every moment of my life if i bring awareness and compassion to each task. this job would be easier if i had help, but there is something deeply satisfying about doing it alone. this is a solo practice and i'm grateful for its gifts.
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